America’s Next Top Model – The Revolution Continues

http://youtu.be/DlyZi3sCSkM

Recently I complained about missing the premier of ANTM’s millionth cycle because of lack of advertising and the ratings for that episode seemed to confirm it’s “under the radar” airing.  This week, ratings were up a tenth in the coveted 18-49 demographic…huzzah?

Thanks to the magic of the DVR, I am all caught up on the past 2 episodes, and I’m not sure how I feel about the “British Invasion” theme.

The British are coming! The British are coming!

I love my country as much as the next person, but I don’t know if I can handle an entire season of USA! USA! USA! from a bunch of young ladies who, while well meaning, probably can’t find our capital on a map.  But if this cycle of ANTM tells us nothing, it shows us that this vague handle on the world, history, reality…is not confined within our borders.

This week was the best episode of any cycle – makeovers! Excuse me, Ty-overs since Tyra has to add her name and/or crazy to everything in the show.

What? No Ty-overs this season?  Ahhhh, SHAKEOVERS. Because she was giving some of them pink hair or red/white/blue hair or bangs! Ooooh Tyra, you rebel!

TVDuck does a good and highly humorous breakdown of the makeovers, so why repeat?

I don’t understand how any of these aspiring models can show up to the set, at this point, and act surprise that they might get their hair cut.  We’ve seen crying, breakdowns, hissy fits. “You’re going to make me look like a boy!” There was even the time a model quit rather than let Tyra have her way with her.

http://youtu.be/yKWaLbeMyjg

This time we got both from UK model wannabe, Louise. Not only were they going to cut her precious hair, but make it darker!  I think the phrase I’m looking for is first world problems?  Honey, the cut was so much more flattering. Trust me.  Not sure about the color though. You might have been right about that one.

Louise...it's Sally Hershberger. Not Supercuts. Relax.

This was followed by something more out of Survivor than ANTM — the groups had to eat the native foods of the other group. So that means the Americans had to eat haggis and the Brits had to eat pig’s feet.   I would have thought everyone would eat McD’s…  One of the Americans (they are all so interchangeable at this point, I think it was Seymone) chowed down on the haggis and won. What did she win? NOTHING! Or at least nothing I could discern.

Photo shoot this week? With Kris Jenner. That’s right, the woman who wrought the trifecta of Kim-Khloe-Kourtney upon us. Sigh.  And the concept was that the contestants would essentially be babies/toddlers and Kris was the mama.  Freud would have such a field day with this one.

This is truly out of my nightmares.

Three cheers for her red white and blue

While Laura and her american flag hair won best picture, this time around the Brits did better overall than the Americans.  And Mariah, the first Native American on the show, was. sent. home.

Next week Cat Deely. SQUEEEEE!

PS – No more lip flags. Pretty please?

PPS – Brits? Keep up the bitchiness. I’m enjoying.

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Bob’s Burgers, One Day to Season 2

I have been trying to make my case the amazing Bob’s Burgers should be watched by everyone with a sense of humor.  Yesterday, NY Mag’s blog Vulture clearly agrees and does it again with this great chat with the three cast members below:
Kristen Schaal, who plays youngest daughter Louise.

Kristen Schaal

Louise or as her mother calls her "My little lady"

John Roberts who plays Linda, Bob’s wife

John Roberts - Did you think that's what Linda looked like?

Linda, who has always wanted to go on a haunted Jamaican honeymoon

And H. Jon Benjamin, aka Bob himself (and looks beautiful in his makeup in the video):

Did you know Jon Benjamin has a van?

Bob. He likes building models, like the bus from Speed.

I assume everyone will be watching tomorrow at 8:30 pm on Fox.

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Game of Thrones – The Crocheted Starks

Only 23 days till Game of Thrones season 2 premiers…

Best Week Ever continues to be an excellent source of amusing, interesting, and utterly bizarre things.

For example, today this from Lunas Crafts on Etsy:

If winter is coming, they will keep you warm

Love how Bran is seated in the picture, Jon is off to the side like the bastard son he is, and most importantly, Arya has Needle.

(I should point out the BWE has mistakenly spelled it “Starke”. Ned would so not be happy…if he still had his head)

The Starks never did have much of a sense of humor

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Greatest TV Drama in the Past 25 Years – Update

Earlier this week I posted about Vulture‘s version of March Madness – figuring out which show should be declared the best drama in the past 25 years.

Even though the first round isn’t over, an update might be interesting — especially with some of the choices:
Sopranos vs Six Feet UnderSopranos clearly beat out SFU.

The Shield vs NYPD BlueThe Shieldwas deemed superior. Dennis Franz’s butt is no Michael Chiklis.

Vic Mackey. You don't mess with him.

The Wire vs My So-Called LifeThe Wire won this one, even though some might say it was highly uneven battle.  Thing is, you can’t win against Omar.

It's Omar yo. Or Michael K. Williams if you need to get specific

Breaking Bad vs Friday Night Lights – Texas may be forever, but Breaking Bad beat FNL.

Walter White. He is the one who knocks.

Coach Taylor took it hard.

Do you mean clear eyes, full hearts CAN lose?

X-Files vs The West Wing – They picked X-Files.  This one was a bit of a head scratcher for me. I can see some of their points with X-Files, but I feel like West Wing was an overall better show.  I stand by my initial thought.

The truth is out there.

Personally, I think Duchovy tried to seduce them.

Agent Muldur. F.B.I.

Anyone have theories on the upcoming battles? Could be some surprises ahead:
Twin Peaks vs Battlestar Galactica
Mad Men vs Lost
Buffy the Vampire Slayer vs Deadwood – I have a feeling Deadwood is in trouble.

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Eddie Murphy Does It Again in A Thousand Words

And by it, I mean make a really crappy movie.

Surprising no one, right now Murphy’s new movie A Thousand Words has a current rating of 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.

On the heels of backing out of hosting the Oscars, Murphy’s latest crapfest is about a slick agent who learns he only has a thousand words left to say and when he says them all, he will die.  On the surface, it’s an interesting idea – Murphy is known for running his mouth, so how will this work?  Well, according to Variety, not well at all

 even Murphy’s largely wordless, physically adroit performance can’t redeem this tortured exercise in high-concept spiritualist hokum, which suggests a cross between “Liar Liar” and Shel Silverstein’s “The Giving Tree,” but with more kitsch and gay jokes. Commercial prospects look none too fertile.

It’s kind of sad really.  With very few exceptions (Dreamgirls being one of them), the only successful movies Murphy has done in over a decade are animated.  He used to make comedy classics: Beverly Hills Cop, Trading Places , and Coming to America.  Not to mention his highly successful run on Saturday Night Live.

But somewhere along the way, Murphy lost it.
He started doing movies where he had to dress in a fat suit.

Here he is as multiple fat people

Yes, you are right. Flatulence and fat people are endlessly funny!

It got embarrassing. For him. For us.

He tried with Dreamgirls, but I think he became disillusioned once he lost the Oscar that everyone else was saying he would win.  And he was great as Donkey in the Shrek movies, but even that got tiring after a while.

I’m sure some critics will like this movie. Probably Armond White.  But Murphy has a long way to go to win back our trust, and our love.

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Coolest Bookmark Ever

With a Kindle this might not be as necessary, but for the hundreds upon hundreds of real books out there (and in piles on my floor), these seem like an absolute necessity.

No more kitty, puppy, or baby themed bookmarks for me!

 

Albatros bookmarks from Oscar Lhermitte on Vimeo.

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Were you watching Happy Endings?

Usually when a network premieres a show in spring, it’s because they don’t have all that much hope for it.  It’s the dumping ground for the shows they picked up for a run of a few episodes and now need to air at some point.

So when Happy Endings started last year, I wasn’t terribly hopeful.  ABC was desperately looking for a show to follow their smash Modern Family.  My beloved Cougar Town was delayed so they could try out Mr. Sunshine with Matthew Perry.

Matthew Perry in ABC's short-lived Mr. Sunshine

This being the former-Friends star’s first attempt at a sitcom post-Friends (Studio 60 was a drama…), there was a good bit of buzz around the show.  It also featured Allison Janney and Andrea Anders, who was also in the much-loved-now-canceled Better Off Ted. Although Mr. Sunshine’s first episode which aired in February 2011 had good numbers, by May 2011 the ratings had become too disappointing and ABC canceled it.

I suppose they figure if people weren’t coming to see a former-Friend on TV, maybe they’d see a Friends inspired show, which leads us to Happy Endings.

The initial set-up of Happy Endings focused on a Dave and Alex (Zachary Knighton and Elisha Cuthbert, Jack Bauer’s daughter on 24) who are about to get married, when Alex leaves him at the alter.  Oh, and all their friends which includes Alex’s sister Jane (Eliza Coupe from Scrubs), Jane’s husband Brad (Damon Wayans Jr. – yes those Wayans), Penny (SNL’s amazing Casey Wilson), and her ex-bf who is now gay Max (Adam Pally who steals the show).

It took the show a while to find its footing, as it usually does, but eventually what happened was – if you stuck with it – you found you were watching a show where all six of the characters has absolutely amazing chemistry. The show has managed to break out of it’s Friends shadow (even mocking the comparison) and become a great sitcom in its own right.  Season 2 has even figured out what to do with Alex once they realized that Elisha Cuthbert is actually pretty darned funny and can pull of being an absolute ditz without seeming moronic.

Most importantly, last night the show avoided a key plot problem, at least for now.  Dave and Alex slept together. Again.  But rather than turn this isn’t a season-long drawn out saga, they took the situation, turned it humorous (Alex and Jane try to convince Dave it never actually happened), and when that didn’t take, Dave and Alex just agreed to pretend it didn’t happen so that they could stay friends. No drama. No crying. No “we were on a break”.  Just like that.  Who knows what the future will bring, but for now, we are spared that whole “will they or won’t they” dance that every sitcom seems to do.

Max and Penny in their Halloween Costume

Of course the main reason to be watching the show are for the Penny and Max scenes. A few weeks ago Max was in his winter hibernation mode and Adam Pally spent the entire episode acting like a bear to the point where he got his head stuck a la Winnie the Pooh.    Or during that same episode Penny bought flowy pants from Bassett by Angela for Angela Bassett, though those might be overshadowed by the pyjoveralls she wore the next episode (like pajama pants…but overalls).

Last night happened to be last episode for a while and the show is on the bubble. And I’m worried. This show along with Community, Parks and Rec (also on hiatus after tonight), Cougar Town are  funny and smart quirky comedies that are all in danger of cancellation.  Can we really live in a world where there is no Community or Happy Endings, but there IS a Last Man Standing? How can the television people live with themselves if they trash Parks and Rec but keep on making Two and a Half Men?

People, we are better this.  We deserve funny shows.  So watch Happy Endings. Watch and enjoy.

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The Solar Flare or Why You Can’t Watch TV

Tuesday’s massive solar flare will be causing some electrical issues today and there is talk that it might – heaven for fend! – disrupt things like power grids, cell phone signals. (Also plane to land communications which can be quite dangerous)

NASA was kind enough to release this high def video of the solar flare that will no doubt wreak havoc on our lives today. Or not. Either way this just goes a long way to reinforcing how ridiculously amazing and literally awesome outer space is.

http://youtu.be/4xKRBkBBEP0

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SNL Classic: Hedley and Wyche

After having a nice long conversation with an old friend about how much we both miss Phil “Troy McClure” Hartman, I immediately went to Hulu to find old SNL Hartman clips. What I found was this.
Hedley and Wyche – For a smile that says, ‘yum – that was good.’

Vodpod videos no longer available.

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I still hate myself for caring about Snooki…now engaged

As Danny Glover said in Lethal Weapons 1-4, I’m getting too old for this sh*t.

Oh Snooki, why oh why do I care that you are knocked up? And why now much I care that you are engaged to someone you’ll probably never end up marrying?  What is it they are putting in our water to addle our brains so?  Was it subliminal messaging while we watched Downton Abbey?  Are your drunken shenanigans so entertaining that we lose all grip of what is good and holy and worthwhile?

In any case, the damage is done.  And to answer the question posed below, yes you should be worried about drinking that first month because you most likely drank enough for three pregnant ladies.

Look to Us Weekly to continue the barrage of terrible:

Snooki beguiles from the cover of Us Weekly

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