SNL Classics: Red Ships of Spain

Posted on August 15, 2012 by ilmozart

For so so many tangible reasons and many that are intangible, this is one of my absolute favorite SNL sketches.

It has all the necessary components: Will Ferrell, Chris Parnell, Alec Baldwin, and wonderful, terrible songs. But yet, I feel that this is one of the lesser-loved sketches of both Ferrell and Baldwin.

Ferrell’s Robert Goulet has that wonderful swagger that Baldwin can copy and improve on and Parnell can fail to copy. The three of them all have the same hair, sunglasses, and inability to remember their lines (“Before we get on the airplane” anyone?), and their sniping is priceless.

The physiciality of the duet between Ferrell’s Goulet and Ana Gastyer who plays Goulet’s daughter and romantic interest in the musical is just gangbusters. Especially the moment when he just keeps trying to kiss (though with that open mouth it looks more like slurp) his daughter and she is just straining with all her might to get the hell away from him.

But what really makes this sketch for me are the comments from the theater critics:

“I don’t think that legally this qualifies as theater”

“The only time the audience applauded was when I whipped a battery at the actors.”

And of course… “True story. I fell asleep during the production and when I woke up was so convinced that I was still dreaming, I got up on stage and walked around. The odd thing is, the show is such an ugly mess, that no one seemed to notice or care.”

That’s the quote I would one day like to see applied to a real Broadway show.

Eventual musical version of Batman which I’m guessing will be called “The Dark Knight: Turn On the Lights” …I’m looking at you…

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New Trailer Alert: Great Expectations

Posted on August 14, 2012 by ilmozart

Confession time: I don’t particularly care for Charles Dickens.

As a former English major, I know that is close to sacrilege for some, but I find the man just too darned wordy. I could barely make it through A Tale of Two Cities – my mother had to read the last 100 pages aloud to me when I was in seventh grade.

Which of course means that my only touch points for Great Expectations are the Gwyneth Paltrow/Ethan Hawke movie from 1998 and the South Park episode about Pip.

Maybe he’ll have unnatural feelings for a horse in the this film too

Of course Helena Bonham Carter is playing Mrs. Havisham. It’s the part her hair was born to play.

However, this version with the boy who was in love with a horse in War Horse, Lucretia Borgia, Bellatrix Lestrange, and the Dark Lord himself looks pretty good if not a bit over the top in a delightful way.

With this and the new film adaptation of Anna Karenina coming out later this year, perhaps the Oscars will have a decidedly literary bent…?

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Adventure Time: My New Cartoon Obsession

Posted on August 14, 2012 by ilmozart

Finding myself watching almost every single show on Adult Swim is one thing, but I didn’t really expect to find my newest animated obsession on the kid’s version of Cartoon Network. And yet, here I am.

I had seen this weird commercial for some show called Adventure Time while waiting for a movie to start. It just seemed very weird. There was this kid in a hat, a dog, and some wizard in blue.  Having no real knowledge of the show, I chalked it up to just another bizarre kids cartoon that I would have no interest in.

Jake the dog and Finn the Human

And I felt that way until around three weeks ago. Flipping through the channels, desperate for something to watch, I decided to see what was on Cartoon Network. The first thing I heard when I turned was Bender. As any good Futurama fan would, I adore Bender and find the guy who does his voice, John DiMaggio pretty darned humorous as well. So I thought, if Bender is on this strange show, maybe I should give it shot.

A month later, I’m watching every episode I can find.

PBG and Princess Ranicorn

Because the show is already in its third season and I’m seeing everything in a very haphazard fashion, I am still learning about the relationships and backgrounds of the characters. But I have learned enough to say that Adventure Time is about this 13 (or 14 depending) year old boy named Finn (the human) who lives in a treehouse with his best friend, a magical talking, shapeshifting dog named Jake, in the Land of Oo. The Land of Ooo is populated by all manner of different kingdoms – the Candy Kingdom ruled by Princess Bubblegum, the Fire Kingdom, etc. And each of these kingdoms seems have a princess. And there’s this guy, the Ice King who keeps trying to kidnap the princesses, so Finn has to rescue them. Oh, and there’s this ranicorn (half unicorn, half rainbow), and vampire named Marcelline whose father is the king of the Nightosphere…

Yeah, it’s a really trippy show.

At the heart of it, Finn really just wants to be a hero. He deals openly with his own emotional states, usually focused on his unrequited crush on Princess Bubblegum, and never backs down from any challenge to prove himself. And Jake mostly wants to help him. He sometimes has his own fairly twisted agenda…

BMO gets the noire treatment

And like so many of the brilliant children’s cartoons before it – Looney Tunes, Animaniacs, Spongebob Squarepants – this is a show that can easily appeal to adults. Recently there was an entire episode devoted to film noire, aptly named “BMO Noire”. How many elementary school kids can talk about Double Indemnity or The Maltese Falcon? They probably just thought it was cool that the show became black and white and that BMO (Beemo), the walking, talking Nintendo Gameboy, turned into a hard boiled detective, looking in the mystery of Finn’s missing sock. And as you expected, the chicken clearly had something to hide. But every second of that episode had its nods to Bogey and film history.

Jake and Finn. Ready to battle.

Or take for example an episode called “Card Wars” from a few weeks ago. If ever there was a cartoon to appeal to the nerd in all of us, it was this episode. Jake was loudly lamenting that his girlfriend, Princess Ranicorn, didn’t want to play his great game with him. Even BMO refused to play the game with Jake. When Finn asks Jake about this game, Jake describes it thusly  “It’s a fancy card game that’s super complicated and awesome”- and they play so “the loser is a dweeb and the winner is cool guy”… how would you NOT play? The game involves an ancient scholar, a very powerful cornfield (because cornfields are awesome), and flooping the pig.

The episode of course becomes about playing with someone who is so assured of their eventual victory that the moment they start to lose, they become a hideous monster. And I’m sure we’ve all been there.

Jake, laying waste to all

The animation is both basic and highly evocative. Whether illustrating the simple details to show emotion or excitement in Jake’s eyes
or the intricate piecemeal creation of Princess Monster Wife (created by the Ice King from pieces of all the other princesses in the kingdom)
or the carefully constructed Dante/Bosch-esque world of the Nightosphere
the show is always a pleasure to look at and you feel the care and commitment that goes into every single episode.

They’re always after her lumps

All he wanted to be is a princess

Adventure Time is filled an assortment of odd but endearing, characters: Lumpy Space Princess (or LSP), a floating purple mass of, well, lumps, who talks like a very masculine valley girl and who is voice by the show’s creator Pendleton Ward; a Hug-Wolf who, via hugs, turns others into wolf-like creatures, with hearts shaped hands and feet and a burning to desire to HUG; Princess Cookie (voiced by Scrub’s own chocolate bear, Donald Faison), a troubled youth named Baby Snaps who only wanted to be a princess just like Princess Bubblegum. None of these characters is every just wholly on the surface.

I can’t believe it took me this long to start watching.

http://youtu.be/113yv-Kdy7I

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Just how clueless is Mel Gibson?

Posted on August 13, 2012 by ilmozart

The answer is: very.

Smile pretty for the prison camera

In an interview on Comingsoon.net, Gibson basically says he didn’t do anything wrong:

CS: Robert Downey went out of his way to publicly support you as you did him when he was going through personal crises. Is Hollywood ultimately a forgiving town?
Gibson: No it’s not. They have to forget. I don’t even think they’re vindictive. I don’t think they think there’s reason to forgive. And forgive what to begin with? What are they asking for? It’s almost like can you please forgive me for what? What did I do, really? It is kind of ridiculous. So it’s kind of hard to pinpoint exactly what needs to be forgiven and I don’t consider that anything does because I didn’t hurt anyone. But you know, hey that’s life. It ain’t easy and it’s not fair. You’ve just got to slip the old water off the back and move on.

Let’s take a moment to let that sink in. What did I do, really?

Gibson laughing at…who the hell knows

So yes, while Gibson didn’t kill anyone (COUGH OJ COUGH), it’s not like he did nothing. Does he not remember his highly offensive anti-Semitic rant of 2006? It’s kind of hard to overlook a statement like “The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world”, and frequent pairings of the word “fuck” and the word “Jew” in all sorts of combinations. I sorta don’t care that he was drunk – in fact I think that just proves that these are his true feelings. Add to this his insane conversation with his estranged girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, where he threatened her repeatedly, and (still unsure how true this is) the claims made by Joe Ezsterhas in a very long letter that: “I’ve come to the conclusion that the reason you won’t make ‘The Maccabees’ is the ugliest possible one. You hate Jews.”

Mel Gibson can hate Jews. Really, he can. Do I think it’s a good thing or a moral thing to hate someone based solely on their religion? Should Mel hate Jews? Absolutely not. It is pretty despicable. And awfully hateful. And Gibson strikes me as a man absolutely filled with hate. But you have to separate the man from his work…or at least try to.

And I’ve tried. Apart from The Passion of the Christ, which honestly made ME want to kill all Jews in about five seconds, I’ve liked his work. As an actor he did some amazing films – Gallipoli, The Year of Living Dangerously – he had talent. As for the movies he made, they were a bit violent overall, sure. More than little bit of torture here and there…you bet. But I don’t think he’s a terrible director and the son of a bitch knows story structure.

Gibson in Braveheart mode

And while I am fairly disturbed by pretty much anything that comes out this man’s mouth in real life…I have to try and think of him and his movies in two different categories. I can do it with Roman Polanski and Elia Kazan, surely I can try with Mel. I don’t do too well with it, but I can try.

So why do I think he’s clueless? Because HE doesn’t seem to see anything wrong with what he’s done.  He doesn’t seem to get that the things that he’s said are hurtful. And incindiary. And very very dangerous. It’s not like he got drunk and crawled into someone else’s house (COUGH RDJr COUGH) or was found pleasuring himself in a movie theater (COUGH FRED WILLARD/PEE-WEE HERMAN COUGH). He spewed hatred towards an entire people and threatened physical violence to the mother of his child. These are not easily forgettable, or easily forgivable. Even if he thinks he should be forgiven, he should never pretend that any of this is something that can be swept under the rug and brushed off.

It’s his disconnect with reality that makes him clueless. At some point talent doesn’t outweigh simple human decency. He said horrible, terrible things. A little contrition and a little self-awareness would go a long way towards making him seem like he’s not the monster he comes off as.

Yes, you can’t be expected to have to grovel for the rest of your life if you truly made a mistake…but I don’t know that he really made a mistake. Unless that mistake was letting us see how he really feels.

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The Bourne Legacy: Almost But Not Quite

Posted on August 13, 2012 by ilmozart

There was a lot of talk about how the Bourne movies based on the novels by Robert Ludlum re-engerized the action movie genre. We got a main character played by Matt Damon who didn’t automatically come to mind as an action star and who was more than muscles and/or an agenda of revenge. We got tightly plotted story arcs and carefully orchestrated fight sequences. Even the chase scenes were well done. And it turned Matt Damon into more than “that guy who won an Oscar with Ben Affleck”.

So there was some concern about whether this quasi reboot with Jeremy Renner and directed by Tony Gilroy (Michael Clayton, but no real action flicks) would carry on in that great tradition.

Answer: Ehhhhhhhhh, almost.

The biggest problem that The Bourne Legacy has is the goal of reinvention. The movie spends most of its pretty hefty running time (over two hours!) establishing when this story takes place and putting all the characters in the right spot for the action to occur. But by the time everyone is set up and the story is set, there’s very little movie left. They wasted most of the movie on the set-up and didn’t leave enough for the payoff.

I don’t think I’m alone in saying that when the movie actually ended I just sat there in disbelief and kept waiting for the REAL ending. I actually muttered under my breath “No. This isn’t the end. You’ve got to be kidding me.” And then I shook my head when I realized that I was mistaken and yes, this IS the real ending.

They are the sin eaters

This actually points to the fact that the basic story they set is pretty interesting: in a program similar to Treadstone, the government program that created Jason Bourne, there are other men and women who are being modified to be the perfect spies. Because The Bourne Legacy takes place concurrently with The Bourne Ultimatum, so it is Jason Bourne’s actions in that third movie that set in motion everything in this one. In order up the mess that might ensue once Bourne’s story goes public, Ed Norton’s amoral Eric Byer orders the death of all other operatives in the field, including our friend Jeremy Renner.

Renner as Aaron Cross

Renner is an interesting actor. He’s not classically handsome like Damon, but he’s got an attractive restless quality and piercing eyes that serve him well. Renner can easily portray a character where there is more under the surface than on, again something that comes in handy here. But he’s not asked to do much more than the basics here, much the situation that he faced as Hawkeye in The Avengersearlier this summer. Renner’s Aaron Cross ends up partnering with Rachel Weisz’s Doctor Marta Shearing, a member of the scientific community that gave Cross his medically boosted physical prowess and cognitive functions. Weisz’s role is mostly exactly what you think it is, but she and Renner have some good chemistry. Both are being hunted and go on the run together.

A doctor and her patient, just changing his genetic makeup

There are a few great set pieces in The Bourne Legacy, one in Shearing’s house, a ramshackle mansion with great bones, that ends up the locale for some great hand to hand combat. As with many of the other Bourne movies, there is also an extended chase scene in Manila. That goes on for a little too long, honestly. But there are some nifty motorcycle moves…

But in the end, I just wished that they had taken a few minutes from that chase scene, a few minutes from each of the set-up scenes we get in the first hour of the film and added them to the end to give us a really satisfactory ending. Yes, this sets them up for a sequel, but do you really want to wait that long for resolution to this anecdote?

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Goodbye David Rakoff

Posted on August 12, 2012 by ilmozart

When David Rakoff passed away last Thursday, we lost one of our great sardonic voices.

He was an essayist that several people might have mistaken with David Sedaris – they both were featured on This American Life, they both published books of personal essays and they were both very openly gay. But if you paid attention, you knew that was where the similarities ended. Rakoff always took a darker turn and, I think, was probably the better writer.

Many New Yorkers remember Rakoff as the man who dressed up like Sigmund Freud one Christmas and saw patients in the windows at Barney’s in a piece called “Neurotic Yule” – how utterly apropos for a Canadian Jew living in the most neurotic city in the world.

But I remember David Rakoff from his many This American Life pieces – his voice containing a world wariness that mirrored so much of what I felt.  I still hear it in my head. He saw and embraced the absurdity in life and exposed it for us all to see.

If you have not yet read any of his books of collected essays like Fraud, Half-Empty, or Don’t Get Too Comfortable, I suggest picking one of them up. And heck, even if you have, might be time to re-read them.

And if you have not yet seen the Oscar winning short, The New Tenants, starring Rakoff in the worst situation a new tenant might possibly think of…I leave it for you at the bottom of this post.

Rakoff died of cancer, a cancer that had originally reared its ugly head when he was in his 20’s.  He wrote an essay in The New York Times magazine last year about being a patient and the soul-crushing non-action of waiting for news on his condition. When a technician told him to have a “fantastic day” Rakoff mused:

“Fantastic”? Fantastic days are what you wish upon those who have so few sunrises left, those whose lungs are so lesion-spangled with new cancer that they should be embracing as much life as they can. Time’s a-wasting, go out and have yourself a fantastic day!

Fantastic days are for goners. Was I fated to take some final vacation to see Venice for the first and last time? Or should I corral some long-cherished idol (I’m talkin’ to you, Meryl Streep) into posing for a photograph with me, both of us giving a thumbs up to the camera before she beats a hasty retreat back to the Land of the Living? That kind of fantastic day?

And in his New York food diary for New York Magazine just a few months ago, he ran through every item he ate in a week with his usual humor and self-deprecation.

Tuesday, April 17
Tax day. Perhaps a sense of relief made me eat more, but I’d have gorged just as much had I been facing an audit. Black iced coffee, and a Bosc pear eaten on the hoof.

…

In the evening, I went to my friend Roy’s apartment for excellent pan-fried hamburgers, which we ate with Israeli couscous. (Three times in one week. I regret nothing.) A green salad, and for dessert, some dates and two chocolate truffles. The hint of booze in one of them briefly knocks me on my teetotal ass.

As Patton Oswalt tweeted:

Indeed.

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Jon Hamm and Lena Dunham Shill for the New York iPad App

Posted on August 7, 2012 by ilmozart

I love Jon Hamm.

I love Lena Dunham.

I love the New Yorker.

Ergo — I love this video.

If only I had an iPad though…

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Ghostbusters 3 With No Bill Murray?

Posted on August 2, 2012 by ilmozart

That is not a Ghostbusters movie my friends.

Metro has reported that Dan Ackroyd has fessed up and admitted that Bill Murray will not be involved with Ghostbusters 3: The Search for More Money. When asked how feels about this, Ackroyd said:

It’s sad but we’re passing it on to a new generation. Ghostbusters 3 can be a successful movie without Bill. My preference would be to have him involved but at this point he doesn’t seem to be coming and we have to move on. It’s time to make the third one.

I agree with him – it IS sad. But does Ghostbusters really need to be passed to a “new generation”? Not everything needs to be updated. For every success like 21 Jump Street there’s a very very long list of remakes and reinventions that just plain suck. The world of movies and entertainment is littered with such “new generations” and I don’t know anyone who is screaming that it is time to make a third Ghostbusters.

Murry’s Dr. Peter Venkman was the driving force of that team. Ray Stanz and Egon Spengler would still be in a basement at Columbia, tinkering with weird science projects and drilling holes in their heads without him. It was because of HIM that they even got involved with Dana Barrett and her spooky, haunted apartment building in the first movie and the insane painting of Vigo in the second. Who is going to take his place? Louis Tully? Winston Zedmore? Please.

They’re ready to believe you!

From the moment I saw the original Ghostbusters in the theaters for my birthday, it has been one of my all-time favorite movies. I have the entire thing memorized and as with The Simpsons or Seinfeld, can find a Ghostbusters quote for many of life’s events. I cannot tell you how many times I have said “They go up!” or “Yes, have some.”

So while I know I am just adding my voice to the wind and the movie will be made regardless of this one fan’s deep feelings, I cannot condone a new Ghostbusters movie sans Bill Murray. Now pardon me while I eat my feelings away with these Stay Puft marshmallows with my buddy, the Stay Puft marshmallow man.

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Trailer: Doctor Who Series 7

Posted on August 2, 2012 by ilmozart

Remember, fezzes are cool

God, I love Doctor Who. I mean really really love it. Granted, I haven’t watched the older episodes so most Whovians probably wouldn’t consider me a real fan. But I have religiously watched since Christopher Eccleston took up residence in the TARDIS (even downloading the episodes when they only aired in the UK).  I have seen every episode at least twice, including all the Christmas specials. I loved David Tennant and now I adore Matt Smith – fez, bowtie, and all. I even figured out River Song before the great reveal.

Needless to say, this trailer for the new season starting in the fall has gotten me extremely excited.

We have Daleks, dinosaurs, weird wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff, more daleks – in fact an entire arena of daleks waiting to kill the Doctor…and the Weeping Angels. As scary as some have felt the daleks are, I’d say mostly because of that wholly inhuman voice, the Weeping Angels are truly the most terrifying of all the villains on Who – simply because come at you when you close your eyes. Just that. Sounds too ordinary perhaps, but in practice, frightening.

They seem harmless enough…

Just don’t blink.

The Ponds during a happier time

The knowledge that we are losing Rory and Amy, or Mr. and Mrs. Pond, sits on the edge of everything now. We know it will be heartbreaking and we don’t know that both of them make it out alive. While the relationship that Smith’s Doctor has with his companions is not the romantic one Tennant’s Doctor had with his companion, Rose, the Doctor, Rory, and Amy are truly a family and it will be overwhelmingly emotion to see this family destroyed.

But I guess if we are getting Smith riding a dinosaur on a spaceship, we must take what we can get. And in honor of the new season and its plethora of daleks…

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Hulu+ Joins Apple TV. I Hold Back Tears of Joy.

Posted on July 31, 2012 by ilmozart

Entertainment Weekly has just reported that Apple TV hold out, Hulu+, will now be available on said Apple TV. Though, really, it was Apple TV that was the hold out…

Sure, I can watch Hulu+ on my computer, but this means I can now watch those random television programs that aren’t on Netflix on an actual television. Especially great with those BBC show that are only on Hulu, like Rev.

Of course anyone with a PS3, XBox360 or a Roku was able to do this before. But as I received a free Apple TV, I wasn’t about to go out an buy one of those.

Much like Netflix, there is an $8/month fee for the opportunity to stream Hulu+ over your television, and not every show that you can watch online can be watched on other devices (mostly due to contractual restrictions with the networks or production companies). But, also like Netflix, this $8/month fee allows you to watch Hulu+ on your smartphone as well as your computer and TV, so it’s pretty freeing.

They even give us a little video to show us how to watch Hulu+ on Apple TV. Just in case you live under a rock.

(Though I love that they highlight Community in this how-to video.)

And of course a video on how to set it all up…

We are getting closer and closer to never needing DVD’s again. What a brave new world.

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